Don’t mind me…I’m just thinking about how spiders are naturally talented and skilled weavers and they know how to weave their webs and even make functional, stylish homes and nests and whatnot.
So maybe that’s why Spider-Man knows how to sew his suits. He inherited that trait from the spider and just instinctively know how to weave his suits. Maybe. That’s my explanation for it.
Across The Spiderverse (2023) // Homecoming (2017)
one thing you learn living in new york: you literally never know what's going to happen the next day. it's become a general rule of thumb to expect the unexpected, so to speak.
despite this, when the avengers get reports of iron man flying in circles over queens, growing more frantic by the second, they're confused. mainly because they're currently sat at a table with tony stark himself. and, according to his ai, the suit that's out causing mayhem is still securely stored downstairs.
they all head out to see what the hell is going on. they meet with strange on the way, who mutters something about inter-dimensional disturbances and whatnot.
spider-man gets to the scene just before them. the second iron man visibly freezes when he spots him in his red and blue glory. "mr. stark?" they hear him ask. they see as he turns and spots them, and then does a double take. "what's going on?"
"underoos!" real tony calls, nervous, at the same time as the other one spots them, and then lurches forward to all but manhandle peter behind him.
the avengers all tense, readying for a fight. fake tony raises a repulsor. "i just want the kid. i don't want to fight."
"you don't belong here." strange says, infuriatingly calm. "i don't know how you got here, but you need to go home." fake tony nods. strange adds, "you can't take him with you." which earns him a rather mean blast. luckily, he ducks out of the way.
the poor kid is whipping his head back and forth, clearly confused. tony's stomach twists unhappily. "you don't understand," fake tony hisses, "all the work it took to get here. i'm not going home without him."
"you have to." strange takes a step forward, "you can't transport him between universes. it's not viable." the lenses on peter's suit widen, and he looks at the fake tony.
"he's from another universe?" steve asks, disbelieving. strange nods, and opens his mouth to say something more, but is cut off by the other-universe tony. he removes his faceplate, revealing a tony stark that is far more haggard than anyone had ever seen before. he's thinner, his eyes are darker, pleading. he looks like a man who's lost everything.
tony looks to peter, who's still staring, wide-eyed. he can see the gears in his head moving but can't decipher why.
"you dimension hopped to kidnap the kid?" tony asks, a little unfocused. the kid was in danger, and it was all he could think about. "why?" peter turns to him, then back to tony number two. he gasps as something apparently clicks in his brain.
he steps forwards, rounds the other-universe tony and stands in front of him. he instantly lowers the repulsor. "because i'm dead." peter says, confidently.
everyone pauses. they look at the spider like he's gone insane, because he clearly isn't dead, not anymore, at least. but other-universe tony looks like he's had the wind knocked out of him. "pete-"
peter deactivates his mask. "right?" he asks. other-universe tony frantically looks over his face.
"it's my fault." he says, softly. "i'm so sorry. i'm sorry, pete. i'm-"
"come out of the suit."
other-universe tony pauses. "what?"
"come out here, please." peter asks again. other-universe tony does as he asks, stumbling out and immediately into the open and waiting arms of the baby spider. it seems to break him, the embrace; all at once he loses any trace of intimdation and anger and sobs, curling around the boy as much as he can. peter seems unphased, unlike the other heroes, and shushes him. "it's okay, mr. stark. it's not your fault," he murmurs soothingly, only reaching their ears due to the intercom on his suit. "it was never your fault. i chose this, i chose to come up there. i didn't regret it for a second."
other-universe tony heaves. "i was supposed to protect you. i failed. i failed and you're gone and you were so scared and i couldn't do anything-"
"you're wrong," peter soothes, and it's a weird image. the child comforting the adult. "if he was anything like me, then-" for a second, his eyes cut back to this-universe tony. "then he was glad you were there when he was dying. you made him feel safer. it would've been so much worse without you."
and then it all clicks for tony. this was a version of him from a world post-snap, who'd watched a kid he considered his own fade to dust in his arms. who sat in his own guilt, and shame, and loneliness. he knew the feeling all too well, and this tony had crossed dimensions to try and get his kid back in any way possible.
if it were for anyone but peter parker, this tony would've said it was a little dramatic.
he's sent home eventually, the other tony, after some more comforts and a not so subtle hint as to how they got everyone back after the snap, much to strange's dismay. later, real tony sits in the lab, watching peter from across a table, and he asks, "how'd you figure it out?"
"figure what out, mr. stark?"
"why that other me was here." peters looks up from whatever he's tinkering with. frowns.
"well, you invented time travel to get me back," he says. "why would you stop before dimension travel? it just made the most sense." tony has half a mind to argue, but one look at his lab: a midtown high hoodie draped over the back of a chair, a teenager's backpack in the corner, a seperated table with it's own organisational pattern and piles of blueprints, a report card pinned to a board, and a spiderman charm hanging from dum-e, he figures the kid is right.
"yeah, well, i love you a little too damn much then, don't i?" he doesn't think about the words before he says them. he's felt it for so long it feels like a second instinct.
luckily he gets no time to panic. because peter immediately lights up, says, "i love you too." and gets back to work.
damn kid.
Hey!! Can I have Peter and his gf who's not rlly smart but catches a mistake Peter made in his hw and teases him but he doesn't mind? Thanks xx!
bf!peter parker x reader
this has been sitting in my inbox for a WHILEE i am sorry!
not proofread, no warnings
-
you had just bombed your math quiz and you could not feel any worse. math just wasn’t your thing, ela or history? sure, but math and you were never getting along. and that was a fact.
the only person who might’ve been able to raise your spirits was your one and only genius vigilante boyfriend, peter. which led to you vigorously knocking on his apartment door like you did many times, expecting to be greeted by a familiar peter, instead being met with his aunt may.
“hey, there sweet pea! peter won’t be home for a while, but would you like to come in and wait in his room for him?” you nodded while thanking her, being in his room would help remind you of him.
she walked you to his room, though being here so many times you know the place like the back of your hand.
when you walked into his room you were welcomed with messy algebra homework as well as half-done history homework scattered all over his desk.
you hopped down onto his undone bed and patiently waited for peter to come back to tell him all about how math was the worst subject known to man.
-
after what felt like forever you finally heard the bedroom door creek open, with the curly head following.
“hey, sunshine? how are you?” he said while placing a kiss on top of your forehead. you pouted before responding, and that’s when peter knew he was in for a doozy.
“terrible! peter, i failed my math quiz!” flapping your arms up and down for emphasis. peter patted your shoulder, his way of saying ‘i’m sorry’.
“c'mon, it can’t be that bad” peter was sorely mistaken. it was that bad.
“i got a 25%.” he made an ‘o’ shape with his mouth, as though it physically hurt him to hear that grade.
“i mean, whose bright idea was it to come up with trigonometric functions? when will i ever use that in my entire life?” you began to rant. the grade was irritating you considering you’ve never gotten lower than a c in math.
“okay, come show me what you need trouble with.” peter said while pulling you up from his bed and leading you to his untidy desk.
you told him what was confusing you and he thoroughly explained it, but you couldn't seem to focus with that history homework on his desk.
“it's italy.”
“what..?”
“which country did the renaissance begin in? you said germany but it's italy.” he quickly scanned over the question again, skimming over the small paragraph before it.
“you got me, good job smarty pants!” he wasn’t sour or bitter about it all. if anything, he was happy, he knew how much it would mean to you if you corrected the smartest person you knew.
“i am a bit of smarty pants aren’t i?” and with that both you and peter started to explode in a fit of giggles.
-
Marisa Tomei skeleton dress (with ovaries) on Jimmy Kimmel 10/31/23
incorrect marvel quotes 1/?
robert downey jr and tom holland in spider-man: homecoming (2017)
quote source: icarly
it is currently 1AM, I have to wake up at 5 and here I am writing smut.
We all went through puberty, it SUCKS. But just imagine going through puberty with heightened senses... Let's see what it's like to be Peter Parker for a day.
Sexual themes
Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader
Synopsis: Peter gets back into making little videos once the two of you start hanging out
warning: extreme 2017 homecoming era nostalgia
Masterlist
Of course he went for Liz.
Liz was the ingénue. She was perfect in every possible way. Perfect grades, perfect face, and the perfect boy pining after her. You’d been crushing on Peter since the third grade but with Liz around, he never noticed you.
But Liz was gone now. She had moved to Oregon following her dad’s arrest and taken Peter’s feelings for her with her. Now that she was gone, you decided it was time to stop pining after Peter from afar and start pining from up close. And so, when you walked into the cafeteria that day, you didn’t sit at the end of the table like you usually did.
Mj: So what’s for dinner?
Peter: I can’t tell you, it’s a soup-prise!
Mj: …
Mj: Is it soup?
Peter: I soup-pose it could be! *winks*
Mj: Please, enough with the soup puns!
Peter: Wow, you’re soup-per mean.
Mj: STOP!
*one hour later*
Mj: It’s fucking spaghetti?!?!?!
Peter: Mr. Stark, I don't feel so good. Stark: Underoos, you CANNOT use our collective trauma to get out of school
I Don't Smoke by Mitski with Peter Parker & Tony Stark in SPIDER-MAN: HOMECOMING
Tony: honestly, you’re doing a lot better than i expected
Peter: it feels like all i managed to do is… not die
Tony: and believe me, that is a remarkably rare skill
Nat: ‘They’ll never find the body’ is such a boring threat, a better threat would be ‘they’ll never stop finding the body’
MJ, bored: Or just say ‘they’ll be finding parts of you for at least 4 months, and you’ll still be alive for 3 of them’
Nat: Now that’s a threat!
Tony, covering Peter’s ears: *horrified silence*
